That's just the way baseball go

Trophy case

Root, root, root for the home team. If they don't win it's a shame ...

That second-to-last line in "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" sounded poignant tonight. I had the supreme opportunity of attending tonight's 3-1 series-clinching win for the San Francisco Giants over our Texas Rangers.

Three words: Edgar fuckin' Renteria.

That son of a bitch is big time. He'll fart around and look old and bloated. He'll be an afterthought and a minor blip on the free-agent radar screen. Someone signs him. It might require a blog post on that team's home city newspaper.

Get him in the World Series and he's Frank Robinson.

Anyway, it was insanely cool to see a World Series celebration. I'd seen the last 26 or so on TV and I always wondered what it was like for the fans. Knowing that there weren't any games left. No more opportunities or seventh-inning stretches.

It wasn't as cool as I thought. Turns out, it only feels magical when it's your team.

I do feel good for the Giants. Since Barry Bonds was surgically removed from professional baseball, I've had the opportunity of liking the Giants. It's a good old club in a cool city with cool, young, exciting players.

Turns out, they're pretty good too. Cliff Lee was pretty sharp tonight. Tim Lincecum matched him and upped the ante tonight. He made the Rangers look silly.

Silly. That's a good word to use for the Rangers' hitters this series. They were shut out twice and if not for a fortunate Nellie Cruz home run in the bottom of the seventh tonight, it'd be a third time.

The Giants deserve it. Through five games they were head and shoulders better than the Rangers and I have no problem with the way it turned out. There weren't any egregious poor umpire calls, controversy, insane managerial moves or major gaffes.

I can't come here and say, "Well, if so and so had done this and that, the Rangers would have won. It would have been different." Outside of breaking Madison Bumgarner's or Matt Cain's kneecaps, the Rangers didn't have a shot. They were too good.

And it's not like you can say, "Well, this off-season the Rangers need to get them some hitters." That's a silly way of looking at this World Series. You're not going to replace Josh Hamilton, Elvis Andrus, Ian Kinsler or Nelson Cruz. You play another 162 games, work to get back to this place (November baseball in Arlington) and hope you don't see Lincecum and Cain staring you down with some of the best pitching in Series history.

I know that "hope" isn't a strategy. But it doesn't fucking hurt.

I saw Nellie Cruz record the final out for the Texas Rangers in the bottom of the ninth inning. A swinging strike. A stunned silence as the Giants mobbed each other on the field.

Then a chant of "Let's go Rangers!" Dallas-Fort Worth are not baseball towns. But we appreciate a good team full of piss, heart and vinegar when we see one.

There is a lot wrong in Dallas-Fort Worth sports. The Texas Rangers are not one of them.

Giants 4, Rangers 0

Bum

As the Texas Rangers limp into a vital game 5 tonight after a disappointing 4-0 loss last night, there are several points to cover.

1. I'm not hearing much from the folks that wanted to play the San Francisco Giants instead of the Philadelphia Phillies. Nothing against the Phillies and I wouldn't guarantee a World Series win against them if things had gone differently, but they weren't playing as well as the Giants if you consider the entire season. The Phillies were making huge mistakes. The Giants weren't. That translated to this series. The Giants are getting stellar pitching, a whole lot of luck and some clutch hitting. The Giants are the Rangers. And if you think the Rangers were the favorites, then I would argue that the Giants were right there, if not better.

2. Madison Bumgarner goes into next season as the No. 3 starter. Frankly, I like him and Matt Cain more than Lincecum. Not that it matters. Jon Sanchez as your No. 4 is pretty nice.

3. The Giants are good. They're also lucky. How many hard-hit balls of the Rangers go right at Giant outfielders? Look at that Buster Posey home run. Looked like a fly out. Carried right out of the park. Next inning Jeff Franceour gets a hold of one and it dies at the warning track. Nothing against luck. Every team needs it, but the Rangers aren't getting it.

4. Rangers need to be more selective in running on Posey. The kid has a cannon.

5. I feel Tommy Hunter's getting a raw deal in these playoffs. I would say he's on a short lease. Instead, I think Ron Washington's holding on to his collar. Last night was not his fault. He went four and allowed two runs. At some point your offense needs to pick you up. I feel Hunter could've gone another inning allowing you to go with Alexi Ogando, The Darrens and then Neftali Feliz or whoever.

6. Ogando strengthens my argument that Feliz should be made a starter.

7. So happy to see Derek Holland put out there in an important spot. Clearly had the World Series jitters and overcame those.

8. Win two straight and we'll talk.

Alright

Sawed off

I didn't go public with this due to jinx purposes, but I foresaw the 4-2 win last night from the Texas Rangers over the San Francisco Giants in game 3 of the World Series.

These teams are too evenly matched for this not to go at least five.

Several things happened: The Rangers came home to 51,000 fans and hte designated hitter; they reached the underbelly of the Giants rotation whilst the Rangers' rotation is still pretty strong. They played excellent defense, Colby Lewis was spectacular, Neftali Feliz was stupendous (loved Joe Buck's stunned "Wow!" when he blew one by a Giant hitter) and Mitch Moreland saved the day with a 3-run home run.

The complexion of the series has changed a tad. Another win today and we can really talk. Until then, it's good to simply enjoy the first ever World Series win by the Rangers.

Colby Lewis
Calling him "spectacular" may be underselling. He's been the MVP of the Rangers post-season, in my opinion. Or close to it. I could hear arguments for Elvis Andrus, Josh Hamilton and Cliff Lee. The fact that this is an argument is good news for the Rangers. Lewis' post-season: 3-0 -- 26.1 IP - 16 hits - 5 runs - 13 BBs - 24 Ks. If it's the game 7 starter, I have no problem with that. The guy's pitched well in the biggest of games.

Bullpen
I trust these guys: Neftali Feliz, Darren Oliver, Darren O'Day and Alexi Ogando.

Neftali Feliz
How is he not the Rookie of the Year. Man. The dude was tossing smoke hitting 97 and 96 with regularity. Almost all fastballs. The Giants looked dumb up there. Where was he during the eighth inning Thursday?

Cody Ross
I love how everyone creams their jeans when he hits a home run. He's caught lightning in a bottle. He hit a home run on a 90 mph fastball belt-high in the middle of the plate. A good hitter, maybe. Mickey fuckin' Mantle? Hardly.

Serenity now

Batting practice

I'm 30. I've had the fantastic opportunity to watch a lot of sports, and, Lord willing, I'll get to see a lot more before I'm called to that great paradise just over the hilltop.

With that said, there's a bunch that I'll never understand about sports.

I'll never understand why NBA players can't hit free throws at at least an 85 percent clip. Especially if you hit three pointers at a 40 percent rate.

And I'll never understand walks. The inability for a professional pitcher to throw enough baseballs in the general area of the "strike zone" (as established by an inpartial umpire) is beyond my comprehension.

I'll never understand why Derek Holland threw 11 straight balls in last night's eighth inning of a 9-0 loss to the San Francisco Giants. I'll never understand why Mark Lowe was unable to throw enough strikes.

I'll never understand why those two were placed in the situation to meltdown like this. Lowe shouldn't be on the post-season roster. He should've been shutdown or sent to Mexico for winter ball. Once Holland threw, oh, the first three balls, I would've been at the mound, talking him down from the ledge.

Instead, Ron Washington and his coaches let the kid melt in front of God and everyone. If he's never right with baseball again, you can blame those guys.

The utter discombobulation and malfeseance shown by Washington and his coaching staff during the eighth inning is very much inexcusable. Someone should've been warming up in the bullpen. Someone should've been making trips to the mound.

Someone needed to put their finger in the dyke. No one did.

In the big picture, it didn't matter. Edgar Renteria's solo home run earlier in the game was all the Giants needed. But it's the principle. Maybe the Rangers get something going down 2-0 in the eighth and ninth innings. No scientific evidence to back this up, but more teams come back down 2-0 than 9-0.

Furthermore, why was Darren O'Day even taken out of the game? Why wasn't Neftali Feliz anywhere to be seen?

I love Ron Washington. I gave him all the latitutde in the world when it came out he'd tested positive for coke, but one thing he's never done well is handle a bullpen. It's happened all the time since he's became the manager and it happened dozens of times this season. It's no surprise. But it still disappoints.

I'd also like to know what's happening in the dugout. Is Wash being told direction or suggestions from Jackie Moore, Clint Hurdle andMike Maddux and he's not listening? Is he just managing on a whim? Are they staying quiet? I'd like some answers and I wouldn't think these would be entirely hard to come by.

Dudes:

Matt Cain
I've always liked Cain and when it was rumored over the past three seasons that the Rangers might could pry the righty from the Giants, I'd always supported it. Next season, if you give me the choice between Lincecum and Cain to start a team, I take Cain. The guy is stupendous.

C.J. Wilson
Another guy who was pretty salty. Wilson was really good and deserved a better fate in game 1 of the ALCS and, now, here. He allowed just three hits and perpetually made the Giants' offense look like ... the Giants offense. That's what we wanted out of Cliff Lee the night before. Had the Rangers offense done anything, this might be a different outcome for Wilson. With a lead, Wilson probably stays in the game in the seventh, Darren Oliver comes in for the eighth and Neftali Feliz for the ninth. Maybe Ollie gives up a lead in this scenario in the eighth. But you go down with your best pitchers on the bump.

Nelson Cruz
By my count, his inclusion as the right fielder in lieu of Vladimir Guerrero saved the Rangers two runs. Of course, they lost 9-0. But on two catches that saved runs, it kept the game 0-0 and 1-0.

Josh Hamilton, Mike Young, Nelson Cruz, Ian Kinsler
Guess what kiddies?! It's nut-cutting time. You wanted post-season baseball and now it's time to quit hacking at pitches and start pulling up your big-boy pants and taking an approach at the plate that resembles Major Leaguers.

Ron Washington
With the game on the line, Lowe, Holland, Mike Kirkman and Jorge Cantu do not sniff the field.

Deliver us, Ceejus

Wilson!

Going home, 1-1 is all that matters. C.J. Wilson on the bump. Need a big outing.

Vlad Guerrero on the bench. Instead, we get Nellie Cruz in right and Dave Murphy in left.

Giants 11, Ranger 7

Field of nightmares

Contrary to popular belief (based on e-mails, texts I've received), MLB did not award the San Francisco Giants their 2010 World Series rings after the 11-7 win over the Texas Rangers last night.

They apparently, like all other World Series champions, must win the minimum amount of games to clinch the series.

Following game 1 of the ALCS, I got angry. I was cussing and ranting. I should be cussing and ranting now.

I don't mind losing. Again, if getting to the ALCS was the cherry on the sundae, getting to the World Series is like getting a blowjob while eating the sundae.

Losing is fine. It's how you lose that kills me. In the ALCS, it was walks (that annoy the shit out of me) and poor baserunning.

In game 1 of the World Series, it was errors, poor baserunning and lack of playmaking in the field.

Why am I not irate today? Because getting mad at Mike Young and Vlad Guerrero for poor play in the field is useless. They're not what they used to be and there's no other option at third base and I depend on Ron Washington to make a decision on right field.

Ian Kinsler's baserunning snafu in the eighth wasn't nearly as bad as getting picked off. He thought the ball went past Aubrey Huff. I have no idea if Garry Pettis said anything to Kins to indicate the ball got through. It's a bang-bang play that killed a potential rally.

Game 1 of the World Series was eerily like game 1 of the ALCS: Rangers get up early, the big inning buries them, a late-inning Ian Kinsler running error.

It was also a game of "what-ifs" for me, something I don't do too often. What if Darren O'Day keeps Juan Uribe in the yard? What if Mark Lowe stems the tide in the eighth? What if the Rangers knock a few more across in the first?

There are tons of plays that teetered going one way or the other. That's more encouraging than discouraging. As I get a World Series blowjob.

Several players:

Cliff Lee
Simply didn't have his breaking pitch going over for strikes. Maybe it was the eight days off or maybe he tweaked his back. Or maybe, like every pitcher in the history of the game, his goddamn curveball didn't get over for strikes. Life is sometimes simple.

Mike Young
It's funny how Jon Daniels works his ass off to put a winning team so Mike Young can get to the playoffs only to find that Mike Young is not a post-season player. Hitting .235, 0-4 last night and leaving three men on base. Thanks for showing up. On top of all that, he was horrid in the field. His error with no outs sparked the Giants' rally in the third inning. Then, his lack of range resulted in Freddy Sanchez' 800th double of the night to score that first San Fran run. I'm convinced a good third baseman gets that line drive. Third base will need to be addressed in the off-season.

Alexi Ogando
I've been disappointed that Ogando hasn't gotten more time in crucial moments. He was dealing last night. Hitting high-90s with about every pitch. Two innings, four strikeouts, one hit, no walks.

Vladimir Guerrero
Washington's decision to put Guerrero in right field was a mistake. He says he's sticking Vlad back out there. I can't imagine this actually happening. As much as Wash preaches fundamentals and playing the "game" the right way, how can he without looking like a hypocrite? Anyway, Guerrero looked 1,000 years old last night. By my unofficial count, his play (not just errors, but inability to get to balls) cost the Rangers an extra seven bases and at least one run. Doesn't seem like much, but how many more pitches did Lee pitch because of Guerrero's inability to get outs and keep runners out of scoring position?

Bengie Molina
The dude takes a lot of shit for being fat and slow, but he's a gamer and that deserves any and all appreciation.

Giants-Rangers

Big. Bad. Vlad.

It's all seemed too easy. That's the shocking part of this whole thing. How easy it's been.

Whipping up on the Tampa Bay Rays. Going to new Yankee Stadium and taking two of three. Dominating the Yankees. Stealing home. Cliff Lee looking like Sandy Koufax. Colby Lewis looking like Bob Gibson. Elvis Andrus looking like a salty veteran in his 10th post-season.

Eerily easy. Discomforting.

The World Series starts tonight. Texas Rangers versus the San Francisco Giants in a best-of-7 series. Starting in San Francisco for two games.

The nervous energy abounds. The primal uncertainty that envelopes us as a fanbase is electric. Even with Cliff Lee on the mound. Waiting for the other shoe to fall on this thing. Waiting for the pinch only to find ourselves 20 back of the California Angels.

If the first 11 games seemed easy, I doubt the next four (at least) won't be nearly as a cakewalk. There will be blood.

Five keys:

Playing As A Frontrunner
The Texas Rangers haven't just played as underdogs during these playoffs. They've been the underdog over the past 40 years. Do the Rangers know how to play as the frontrunner? Do they know how to play as the team that's supposed to win instead of the team everyone expects to lose?

Vladimir Guerrero
Somehow, a .269 average in the ALCS doesn't appropriately indicate how bad Guerrero was. He rode one good game (four hits). Otherwise, it was three hits in 20-odd at bats. This is it for Guerrero. I don't think he'll be a Ranger next year. He could very well be done for his career. I hope not, but it might. The Rangers need Guerrero to show up and crush.

Jonathan Sanchez
The great X-factor. We think Tim Lincecum and Matt Cain will give the Giants a shot to win. Sanchez is the Giants' primary lefty. He's the team leader in ERA. He's good. He's pitched a no-hitter. He's also a guy that could get pulled in the second inning, like he was the other night against Philly. He's an X-factor. He's a wild card. Whether the Rangers or Giants are 0-2 going into game 3. Or if the Giants are up 1-2 or down 1-2, Sanchez' start means the world.

Bases On Balls
I think walks are killer. I'd rather give up three hits than a walk. Hits are potential outs. Walks aren't. Unfortunately for me, I root for two guys (C.J. Wilson, Colby Lewis) that walk an inordinate amount of hitters. In three of the four Rangers losses this season, the Rangers pitchers registered four or more walks. In five of the Rangers' seven post-season wins, the pitchers registered three or less walks.

Why would walks kill the Rangers against the Giants? Because the Giants, for the season, collected a league-worst 392 walks. On top of that, the Giants were 25th in the league with a .257 team batting average.

Lesson: Throw strikes. Throw a lot of strikes and force the Giants' line-up to hit the ball. A team that clearly has no intention on taking pitches and walking free passes should not be afforded that opportunity by any means.

Baserunning
Antlers, bitches. It's been the key to the Rangers beating the Rays and the Yankees. Not just stealing bases, but scoring from second on groundouts, tagging up, going from first to third on a single. All these things have been responsible for about 60 percent of the Rangers' runs (this stat is not factual ... it might be true, but not based on real research). The Rangers must keep running. Push the Giants into mistakes.

Prediction
Giants, in 7
I've always said that pitching wins championships. The Giants starters and relievers have been better than the Rangers'. For the third straight series, I hope I'm wrong. Please, sweet Jesus, let me be wrong.

The World Series pitching match-ups

Some call me ... Tim

There's no surprises here. The San Francisco Giants will put their top four and the Texas Rangers will put their top four on the mound and everyone will hope for the best.

The difference here is the loss of the designated hitter for at least two of these games.

Or, how Cliff Lee will have one easy out at the butt end of the line-up. Unfortunately, it appears that Colby Lewis will not pick up a bat as he'll pitch in Arlington. This is a bummer because Lewis was the hero in a game against Milwaukee this year when he batted in two runs while going 2-4 in the 6-4 win in June.

Of course, he also went eight innings allowing two runs and striking out 10. We'll take the latter. And we also get to see Tommy Hunter hit.

The match-ups:

Cliff Lee vs. Tim Lincecum
The Rangers -- through interleague play -- have never seen Lincecum. He's the type of pitcher you want to see. That wind-up helps disguise his pitchers that need little disguising. He throws pure, fat mustard. Lincecum's numbers: 23.1 IP - 1.93 ERA - 5 BBs - 30 Ks. Lincecum's only real chink in the armor is against lefties. His BAA is .254 against lefties (compared to .229 against righties). Lincecum also was 10th in the National League in walks (76).

C.J. Wilson vs. Matt Cain
Cain hasn't allowed an earned run in the playoffs, totaling 13.2 innings. He's, clearly, really good. He's always been a horse, but walks have killed him. He's cut those down significantly. He'll allow some gopher balls on you (22 homers allowed), but he's equally dominant against lefties and righties, home and on the road. If he keeps the ball in the yard, he's almost unbeatable. The rub on Wilson is that he's really, really good against lefties (.144 BAA) and so-so against righties. Other than Aubrey Huff, the Giants don't have many lefties in their line-up. Wilson's also gotten worse with each post-season start.

Jonathan Sanchez vs. Colby Lewis
Sanchez is the X-factor for the Giants, at least the pitching. He's a guy that led the Giants with a 3.07 ERA. Still, he had his worse game of the post-season against Philadelphia when he lasted just two innings allowing two runs. He's dominant against lefties, but the Rangers have the flexibility of throwing a lot of right handers against him. Sanchez will pitch in a hitter's park. He's allowed an astonishing (considering his ERA) 96 walks and 21 home runs. Essentially this season, he allowed 238 baserunners in 193 innings. The key for Lewis is that the Giants (or the current incarnation) haven't seen him. Neither had the Yankees (at least since 1996) and he went 2-0 against them.

Madison Bumgarner vs. Tommy Hunter
The debate here was whether the Rangers would go with Hunter or Derek Holland. Hunter has started all post-season, but Holland's come in with some huge long relief. I agree with the Hunter decision. Why mess with things? Also, Holland would be less effective as, again, the Giants don't have a ton of lefties that'll start in the line-up. Going against rookie Madison Bumgarner, I hope Hunter's given more time. He's been pulled early in both post-season starts. Although, he's struck out 12 and walked none in those games. Bumgarner is a stud. But he's young. A lefty, he gets hit hard by righties (.283 BAA), which could be a problem at the Temple. All things considered, the Rangers need to hit him hard and get this game.

Pick your poison

One should consider how high Matt Cain wears his leggings

The Texas Rangers had the opportunity to face either the San Francisco Giants or the Philadelphia Phillies in the World Series.

On Saturday, the Giants dispensed with the Phillies in the sixth game clinching their second trip to the Series in a decade.

There's much debate as to who the better option would be for a Rangers world championship. Honestly, the Giants scare the bejesus out of me.

Why? Because championships in professional baseball are won with pitching, defense and timely hitting. The Rangers do all three really well, as it's been evidenced the last two weeks.

The Giants do it really well, too. In fact, you might consider that the Giants did it better. Or you might also surmise that the Giants are the Rangers.

Exhibit A
The Rangers and Giants were considered upstarts (for different reasons) in their division, yet were widely not considered major factors. Neither were overwhelming picks to win their division despite solid, young line-ups and projected good pitching (although San Fran had the clear edge in this spot).

Exhibit B
The Rangers entered the playoffs as the No. 3 seed with a 90-72 record. The Giants entered the playoffs the No. 2 seed with a 92-70 record.

Exhibit C
The Rangers defeated the No. 1 (Rays) and No. 4 (Yankees) seeds, including last year's World Series representative in the ALCS. The Giants defeated the No. 1 (Phillies) and No. 4 (Braves) seed, including last year's World Series representative in the NLCS.

Exhibit D
The Rangers team ERA in the 2010 playoffs: 2.40. The Giants team ERA in the 2010 playoffs: 2.47.

Exhibit E
The Rangers have hit .273 with 16 home runs in the playoffs, so far. The Giants, however, have hit .231 as a team with just six home runs (four of which are from Cody Ross).

So, the difference is that the Giants have hit the ball far worse from the Rangers despite winning as many games in less opportunities (the Giants beat the Braves in the ALDS in four games).

If the pitching, defense and competition has been the same, the only difference is that the Giants have hit worse, but played arguably better.

Saying, their hits have been more opportunistic and impactful to the game. The Rangers running up the score against New York blurs their total impact. Although, beat the shit out of the Yankees was highly enjoyable.

That's scary. That the Giants have been just as good without the gaudy offensive numbers.

The Giants could be represented as a team of destiny as much as the Rangers. And I think they have the best top three pitchers from stem to stern in the Majors (Tim Lincecum, Jon Sanchez and Matt Cain). Pitching wins championships.

Although I fear the Giants, I probably equally didn't fear the Phillies.

The Phils had played sloppy ball all year. Chase Utley and Jimmy Rollins hadn't been right. Raul Ibanez hasn't been as good and their starting pitching and bullpen have been so-so outside of Roy Halliday all season. How good are they? Despite not having a bullpen and sub-par offensive years, they won 97 games.

The sloppy play translated to the playoffs. They swept the Reds, but against the Giants it was a series of follies and poor fundamentals that sunk them time and again. They didn't seem too focused, which would've been advantageous for the Rangers.

Another smart argument for against the Phillies is their pitching. Over the past three months, Roy Halliday and Roy Oswalt have been great. Cole Hamels as your No. 3 rounds up a salty trio of hurlers.

However, the Rangers have historically hit Halliday and Oswalt very well. In fact:

Halliday Against Rangers, Career
7-7 -- 5.36 ERA

Oswalt Against Rangers, Career
4-6 -- 4.54 ERA

That is unscary. Now, the Rangers must face three young arms in Lincecum, Cain and Sanchez, the latter being a lefty that's had his ups and downs this post-season, but also led the Giants with a 3.07 ERA in the regular season.

The Rangers have just seen Cain once, and he went eight innings allowing one run. Plus, the Giants' bullpen is significantly better than the Phillies'.

The Rangers might win the World Series, but I don't think it's a lock that the Giants would be the easiest opponent. The Giants are playing with as much house money as the Rangers. Ignorance is bliss.

A win for the Texas Rangers is a win for America

Blue, red and white

At the onset of the 2010 season, the New York Yankees had the highest team payroll at an astounding $206 million.

The Rangers were ranked 27th in the league. At $55 million.

The argument as to whether you can buy success is not a black-and-white thing. Either the Philadelphia Phillies or San Francisco Giants will face the Rangers in the World Series. They had the fourth and ninth highest payroll when the season started, respectively.

Then again, division winners Tampa Bay and Cincinnati were ranked 19th and 20th, respectively.

This is why the Rangers making it to the World Series is a win for America. It's about the little guy. David slaying Goliath.

It's hope for everyone. The person in debt to their ears. The fan of the Kansas City Royals or San Diego Padres. The person not given everything to them on a silver platter.

Those of us that have to work. Those of us that get as much enjoyment out of the simplest, smallest things in life (like a claw or antler) as we would the big, grandiose, expensive things.

This is for all of those who hate the New York Yankees. Or Los Angeles Lakers, Detroit Red Wings or Dallas Cowboys. Or Boston Red Sox or New York Knicks.

This is for all of the people that don't live on a coast and don't understand why anyone would really care about New York City or Los Angeles.

The Rangers play with simplicity. They move runners over. They get infield hits, play good defense and slide into first base. They go from first to third, from second to home. They double steal, steal home, hit-and-run, turn two, get picked off and keep running. They slide, dive, leap, sprint, spit, collide, stretch and wear their socks up to their knees.

They are Lettuce, Murph, Hambone, Cliffie, Nefty, Vlad, Tiny E, Crush, TnT, Mitch, Nellie, Colbyashi, Ceej, Frankie, The Darrens, Ollie, Big Game, Nip, Dutch Oven and Scooter.

They bring a guy over from Japan and start them. They stand by a manager who snorted coke a summer ago and can't speak proper English.

They stand by a fuck up and threw away five years of his life for drugs and alcohol. They stood by a young 20-something as he got his feet wet in the world of general managing in the Majors. The same guy thanks his scouts and development guys as the first words out of his mouth in front of 50,000 insane fans and millions more on TV.

They stand by a couple of Dominican kids, who got caught up in a visa scam and were blocked from entering this beautiful country.

For fans of the Texas Rangers, all is right with the world.

For the rest of the world, everything is right. If you don't have a soft spot for the Texas Rangers, then you're ability to feel is questioned.

Pennant

The Texas Rangers are going to the motherfucking World Series!

Pow!

If getting into the playoffs was the sundae, winning a couple of games was like the whipped cream.

Winning the Tampa Bay series was the cherry on top.

Then beating the New York Yankees to win the pennant and a trip to the World Series is like getting a blowjob.

A blowjob while eating a sundae.

The Texas Rangers -- Texas fucking Rangers!!! -- beat the New York Yankees 6-1 tonight to win their American League Championship Series 4-2.

It is the Rangers first pennant. Their first trip to the World Series.

Everything is gone. All the weight and burden are gone. That massive, perpetual guillotine blade that hung over the heads of this franchise and fandom is gone.

No more are they one of the teams to not win a pennant. No longer do they have just one measly playoff victory. No longer are they a laughingstock on any level.

It's all real. It's all good. It's all different. It's a new age in sportsdom in the Metroplex. It's no longer five Super Bowl rings, a Stanley Cup and a trip to the NBA Finals.

Insert: World Series. It's happening.

I can safely say that this is the the greatest day of my sports life. When the Cowboys won that Super Bowl was probably No. 1 before now. The Stanley Cup third and the NBA Finals fourth.

With those other teams, the expectations were there. With the Rangers, it's been a wild, insane ride since fucking last winter. It's come to this impossibility made possible.

My hair's standing on end. It's been this way for three hours. Everything's changed.

There were heroes. These are them.

Colby Lewis
What a performance! What a night! On the biggest stage, when the lights were brightest and his team needed him more than ever, Lewis delivered. A year ago, he was in Japan. Soon, he'll pitch game 3 of the World Series. The guy was as dominant as just about everyone not named "Lee" or "Halliday." He cruised. Threw 102 pitches. He used any number of pitches and kept the Yankees guessing all night, evidenced by the weak pop-ups and groundballs. Lewis' post-season: 18.2 IP - 11 hits - 3 runs - 11 BBs - 18 Ks. Cripes!

Ian Kinsler
The sac fly was huge. The get on Robinson Cano's double play grounder was even bigger.

Vladimir Guerrero
Right when all hope and faith was lost in our Vladdy, he absolutely crushes a Phil Hughes fastball into left-center field beyond any conceivable reach of Curtis Granderson. This, after the Yankees intentionally walked Josh Hamilton to put runners at the corners. No respect. Guerrero taught a brief, excitable lesson in respect.

Alex Rodriguez
Being the final out -- on strikes, no less -- was symmetry. Poetry, even. It was a perfect end. Neftali Feliz could've gotten Jorge Posada to ground out, but it would not have been as awesome as striking out Gay-Rod. Perfect.

Bengie Molina
I largely ignore Molina. You could point to getting Granderson stealing second, but that wasn't even a very good throw. Without Kins' tag and Granderson popping his foot up, he's safe. My acknowledgement of Molina's leadership came after Alex Rodriguez scored from third after the hit by pitch on Nick Swisher. The ump screwed the call to holy hell. Molina knew it. He he gave that dumbass ump hell. It was really cool to see a player fighting like a fucking rabid dog for the win.

Dave Robertson
For being the worst relief pitcher in Yankees' post-season history. He's the anti-Cliff Lee or anti-Mariano Rivera. Against the Rangers: 2.2 IP - 8 hits - 6 ER - 1 BB - 4 Ks.

Elvis Andrus
Josh Hamilton was named the MVP. Deservedly so. But Andrus is a salty second choice. The offense was only matched by the defense. He's stellar no matter what he does. Getting the bat on ball on the Mitch Moreland hit and run ... that's a 10-year veteran move. Twenty-two year olds do not make that play. They don't make a lot of plays that 22-year-olds make. He's a phenomenal athlete.